Anti-Literacy BYU Students Outraged Over February ‘Library Lover’s Month’

Anti-literacy sentiments have long been a touchy subject in the United States, and Provo, Utah is no exception. Last week anti-literacy students at BYU caused a stir at a Question and Answer session with a panel of librarians and library patrons participating in part of the University’s “Library Lover’s Month” celebrations. Anonymous anti-book, anti-literacy questions were submitted to the panel, an event that shocked and … Continue reading Anti-Literacy BYU Students Outraged Over February ‘Library Lover’s Month’

BYU Student Sues Learning Suite For Valentine’s Day Theme Offensive to Singles

What some are calling the case of the decade, a BYU student is suing Learning Suite for discrimination towards his lack of a relationship. Learning Suite, the university’s online student system, published a Valentine’s Day theme on their website for the special holiday. Jeremy Richardson a senior at BYU hit his breaking point. “I don’t understand why they are discriminating against all those that aren’t … Continue reading BYU Student Sues Learning Suite For Valentine’s Day Theme Offensive to Singles

President Worthen spotted at Heart & Seoul, Crushes “Africa” by Toto.

Early Thursday morning around 1:30 AM BYU President Kevin J Worthen was seen in the nearly empty karaoke club, Heart & Seoul on Center Street. According to witnesses, President Worthen entered the establishment at approximately 10:00 PM on Wednesday night and stayed until the club closed at 2:00 AM. While there President Worthen reportedly sang “Wanted Dead or Alive” by Bon Jovi followed by “Girls … Continue reading President Worthen spotted at Heart & Seoul, Crushes “Africa” by Toto.

Scientists Prove that Apartment Proximity to Campus is Inversely Proportional to How Big of a Tool You Are

After an in depth study, scientists (if psychologists can be called scientists) claim to have proven that the distance someone lives from campus is inversely proportional to how big of a tool they are. In other words, if someone lives close to campus, they’re a pretty big tool. The BYU Psychology Department classified five zones for student housing: south of campus for normal people, west … Continue reading Scientists Prove that Apartment Proximity to Campus is Inversely Proportional to How Big of a Tool You Are

BYU Issues Statement about NCMOs to Help Fight Coronavirus

By James West A new strain of coronavirus has been spreading across East Asia and has appeared in the United States. The Alternate Universe has been listening to the airwaves for a response from BYU. In this week’s letter from President Worthen, BYU has finally issued a statement about the coronavirus. The statement reads as follows: The coronavirus is spread through the mucous glands of … Continue reading BYU Issues Statement about NCMOs to Help Fight Coronavirus