After weeks of uncertainty, BYU has made the decision to hold hybrid classes for fall semester. The classes will focus mostly on the 2019 Ford Fusion, as Ford has agreed to sponsor future mechanics in their education. The Nissan Leaf and the Toyota Prius will also be discussed and examined. “I’m so excited about the hybrid classes!” said senior Mike Gerage, “I’ve been so sick … Continue reading BYU Announces Hybrid Classes For Fall Semester
Kevin J. Worthen announced the much-anticipated outline for the Fall 2020 semester that many students have been anxiously waiting for. To much of the student population’s surprise though, the guidelines that were announced for the upcoming semester were far more strenuous than expected. They announced that masks would be required for eternity. “We have to get used to this new normal. Masks will be required … Continue reading BYU Announces That Masks are Required for Eternity Starting Fall 2020
Since a prominent statue of Brigham Young on the campus of BYU was vandalized earlier this week, police have been on the hunt for the vandals. That search was cut short this afternoon as several descendants of Sidney Rigdon came forward and claimed responsibility. They explain that this was simply the latest escalation in a century-long struggle with Brigham Young for authority in the Church … Continue reading Descendants of Sidney Rigdon Claim Responsibility for Statue Vandalism, Citing Century-Long Power Struggle with Brigham Young
Lately, there has been much talk of police reform, with many calling for severe budget cuts and even the elimination of the police. This comes in response to several unjustified acts of police violence against minorities, and most consequentially, African Americans. While attacks on African Americans by BYU police are virtually unheard of (probably due to lack of opportunity more than anything else), slashing the … Continue reading REPORT: Defunding BYU Police Will Topple Parking Ticket Scheme, Bankrupt University
At the conclusion of her elaborate coronation ceremony atop Kimball Tower, BYUSA president Sarah Hughford looked out over campus and was distressed to find not a single one of her subjects below. Sources close to the royal family confirm that President Hughford has exploded into a fit of rage. “What is this insolence? How dare they disrespect the crown!” President Hughford cried out to her … Continue reading ‘Where Have All My Subjects Gone?’ Crys BYUSA President, Anxiously Gazing From Atop Kimball Tower Throne
