As BYU ground out a 27-20 win of UTSA, the lack of fans in the stadium was a welcome circumstance. BYU entered the game as 34 point favorites of the Roadrunners, but could only manage a 7 point win after sloppy play in all phases of the game. “Yeah, it wasn’t the best game we’ve ever played,” said BYU Coach Kalani Sitake. “I’m glad our … Continue reading BYU Grateful No Fans Present For Ugly Win Over UTSA
During Wednesday night’s vice presidential debate between Kamala Harris and Mike Pence, a fly was seen on camera for several minutes. The fly eventually landed on Pence’s head and stayed there. The scene was quite comical for many as Pence hardly noticed. Reports today have revealed that the fly was actually a BYU drone used for spying on the University of Utah. The drone was … Continue reading Fly from VP debate Actually Errant BYU Drone Used for Spying on University of Utah
Brigham Young University has been undergoing several construction projects this semester, much to the dismay of all 5 students who still attend class in person. According to a recent census, there are more construction workers than students physically on campus due to more and more classes moving online and numerous construction projects. Allie Lochlan said that she has to “leave early for every class because … Continue reading All Five Students Who Still Come to Campus “very inconvenienced by construction”
When Utah County saw a spike in COVID-19 cases, true BYU fans were worried about one thing. How would they attend football games? Thanks to some ingenuity on the part of the college, fans were given the opportunity to “pack the seats” via lifesize cardboard cutouts. Local man Stryker Johnson, who hasn’t done anything social outside of his apartment in over 4 months, was the … Continue reading Local Man’s Cardboard Cut-out Currently Has a Better Social Life Than Him
While many Cougar fans were excited to watch BYU take on Troy on Saturday night, a pre-game announcement from BYU AD Tom Holmoe dampened their enthusiasm. “The game between BYU and Troy University has been cancelled. It turns out we had a bit of a mix-up with our scheduling this week. We’re actually going to be playing this guy from Fresno named Troy.” said Holmoe. … Continue reading Due to Miscommunication BYU to Play Game Against a Guy Named Troy
