The latest rendition of the Holy War, described by witnesses as “65% football, 35% miracle,” ended with Brigham Young University triumphing over the University of Utah this weekend, in what religious scholars and diehard fans are calling an “unmistakable act of divine intervention.”

BYU running back LJ Martin credited the 24-21 victory to “a ton of grit, faith, and a few desperate sideline prayers.” He added, “I felt the Spirit really, really strong on that last drive. Either that or dehydration—it’s hard to tell sometimes.”

In a rare press release from the bowels of the underworld, Satan formally conceded the game. “My boys in red fought valiantly, but even I can’t compete with Sitake and his gang. They’re pretty legit,” said the Prince of Perdition. “BYU’s got a lot of discipline, teamwork, and probably a couple angels on the O-line.”

Following the game, Provo erupted in celebration. Students sang hymns in the JFSB courtyard, performed spontaneous baptisms in the RB pool, and gathered in the Marriott Center for an impromptu midnight devotional. Even the Honor Code office noted “excessive joy” on campus immediately after the game, according to a press release: “We have observed immoderate happiness on and around campus this evening, and encourage students to be modest in all their dealings. We are also investigating whether large group hugs constitute a violation of the law of chastity.”

Junior Eddie LaVells described the jubilant scene: “I’ve never felt the Spirit so strongly, in a football context or otherwise. It was like General Conference, but with obscenely unhealthy donuts and without as many centenarians. I can’t really put it into words, but it was sublime.”

While heaven issued no official comment, Sunday morning’s sunrise over Provo was unusually brilliant, which many fans took as confirmation of BYU’s divine ordination.

“That sunrise, to me, was a confirmation of His hand in it all,” said LaVells. “I saw a cloud shaped like an angel spiking a football. That’s all the testimony I need.”