Author: Liz Lemon

Liz Lemon spends her days selling seashells by the seashore and her nights playing bass for the prestigious Fleetwood Mac cover band, Fleetwood Mac & Cheese. She believes news writing to be one of the many menial tasks necessary for the well being of the human race. She currently resides in Compton, CA with several of her pet rocks.
Life

New Taylor Swift Album Allegedly Written, Photographed in LDS Sacred Grove

With the surprise release of Taylor Swift’s “Folklore”, many critics and theorists have speculated about the circumstances in which Swift wrote the songs. Most guessed that the hit record was a result of Swift’s quarantine due to COVID-19. However, as time has gone on, new details have come to light. A source close to Taylor Swift suggests that the entire album was written in the … Continue reading New Taylor Swift Album Allegedly Written, Photographed in LDS Sacred Grove

Liz Lemon1 Comment
Campus

BYU Announces Lamest Devotional/Forum Line-Up Ever In Anticipation of Cancellation

University Communications released a statement in regards to the line-up of Fall Semester Devotionals and Forums early this morning. The statement says that the Committee in charge of devotionals “did not try very hard” when selecting the speakers. “We didn’t even bother contacting any general authorities, so you’ll just have to learn from a random religion professor”, said a committee member. The statement also notes … Continue reading BYU Announces Lamest Devotional/Forum Line-Up Ever In Anticipation of Cancellation

Liz Lemon
News

Utah Prepares For Second Wave of COVID-19 Cases As Thousands Of LDS Families Return From Disney World

The Office of Governor Herbert released a statement announcing extreme preparations in regards to the return of thousands of Latter-Day Saint families from the grand re-opening of Disney World in Orlando Florida. The statement included plans for more hospital space and a potential mandated quarantine. “We don’t expect LDS families to be able to resist their home away from home, Disney World, so we’re taking … Continue reading Utah Prepares For Second Wave of COVID-19 Cases As Thousands Of LDS Families Return From Disney World

Liz Lemon
Campus, Life

BYU refuses to drop ACT/SAT admission requirements; adds Old Testament themed obstacle course to application

Due to the widespread COVID-19 pandemic, many colleges and universities across the US have dropped the standardized testing requirement from their admissions process. BYU is not one of these schools. In a statement issued on Thursday, the school announced that the ACT/SAT was here to stay. A representative for the university also mentioned that the administration felt that more requirements were necessary. These additional requirements … Continue reading BYU refuses to drop ACT/SAT admission requirements; adds Old Testament themed obstacle course to application

Liz Lemon
Campus

BYU Announces Hybrid Classes For Fall Semester

After weeks of uncertainty, BYU has made the decision to hold hybrid classes for fall semester. The classes will focus mostly on the 2019 Ford Fusion, as Ford has agreed to sponsor future mechanics in their education. The Nissan Leaf and the Toyota Prius will also be discussed and examined. “I’m so excited about the hybrid classes!” said senior Mike Gerage, “I’ve been so sick … Continue reading BYU Announces Hybrid Classes For Fall Semester

Liz Lemon