Author: Lisa Simpson

Featured, News, Sports

BYUtv Boxing Day Highlights: “Hunk Smith” vs. Hasbulla

One of America’s most highly anticipated holidays is finally here. This year, as always, BYUtv has lined up quite the Boxing Day talent. With opponents such as Laman vs. Lemuel, Mitt Romney vs. Obama, and Cosmo the Cougar vs. Costco the Ocelot, families all over the globe are tuning in to watch the blood fall. The match this morning, Hasbulla vs. “Hunk Smith”, has already … Continue reading BYUtv Boxing Day Highlights: “Hunk Smith” vs. Hasbulla

Lisa Simpson
Featured, Life, News

“The Virgin Mariah Carey” to Star in Church’s New Musical Nativity

Two years ago, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints wowed audiences with the release of “The Christ Child”, a historically accurate telling of Jesus’ nativity. This year, in place of historical accuracy, the new nativity will aim for musical splendor. To be released on the 24th of December, the nativity will star Mariah Carey as “the Virgin Mariah”. Since Mariah’s fame skyrockets (and … Continue reading “The Virgin Mariah Carey” to Star in Church’s New Musical Nativity

Lisa Simpson
Campus, News, President Worthen

President Worthen Gets Tongue Stuck on Frozen Pole

For many, the season’s first snowfall was a welcome surprise on the last day of classes. From the square, students can be seen building snowmen, making snow angels, and catching snowflakes on the tips of their tongues. While much of campus is a serene winter wonderland, not everyone is enjoying the chillier weather. The Alternate Universe is currently live at an intense scene outside the … Continue reading President Worthen Gets Tongue Stuck on Frozen Pole

Lisa Simpson
News, Sports

BYU Prays Too Hard for Enemies, Loses to FSU in National Soccer Championship

In Matthew 5:44 of the King James Bible, Jesus says “but I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you”. In the Lord’s locker rooms on BYU campus, this isn’t counsel that many teams take lightly. It is common practice for BYU players to pray for their opponents right before a match. However, the commandment Jesus once gave in his Sermon … Continue reading BYU Prays Too Hard for Enemies, Loses to FSU in National Soccer Championship

Lisa Simpson
Campus, Featured

Student Dies of Embarrassment After Accidentally Playing Song Aloud for 3 seconds in Quiet Part of Library

When you lose someone you love, you gain an angel that you know. “If it had been anywhere else in the library, things might have turned out different. However, lamenting about what could have been won’t bring Chase back home to his family for Thanksgiving,” says Officer Simmons on the scene of the tragedy. Things were quiet late Friday afternoon in the reading room on … Continue reading Student Dies of Embarrassment After Accidentally Playing Song Aloud for 3 seconds in Quiet Part of Library

Lisa Simpson