Ex-mormon who was successfully unvaccinated now considering revaccination over love of FDA

Ex-Mormon Allie Jones made headlines when she announced her successful reverse of her vaccine, her “unvaccination”, much to the bewilderment of medical professionals and the dismay of family and friends. Following the FDA’s full approval on August 23, Allie was faced with a choice tougher than anything she has ever experienced before. While everyone in Allie’s circle has long been frequently reminded about her being … Continue reading Ex-mormon who was successfully unvaccinated now considering revaccination over love of FDA

Student Intends to Prolong His Homeless Week Says its “Better than Having to Deal with Provo Housing”

BYU student Daniel Gaines was supposed to be moving into an ironically named complex owned by the Provo Landlord Confederacy, but after spending the last week “homeless” in Provo, he’s decided that he would rather not have an apartment at all.  “I could pay hundreds of dollars to share a room with someone who snores and never takes out the garbage, or I could live … Continue reading Student Intends to Prolong His Homeless Week Says its “Better than Having to Deal with Provo Housing”

Elder Holland to Visit BYU’s Campus, Shake Hands With Every Student, and Find the Unvaccinated

As the Delta variant looms this upcoming semester, BYU had to call in the big guns to make sure we had a safe semester. Just a day after BYU announced that masks will be required on campus, they announced that they will be instituting more crackdowns to control COVID-19 in the area. Every Tuesday on the way back from devotional, Elder Holland will greet every … Continue reading Elder Holland to Visit BYU’s Campus, Shake Hands With Every Student, and Find the Unvaccinated

Elderly BYU Education Week Attendees Kicked Out After Throwing Massive Parties on Campus

Seventy-year-old Eldon Allred and a number of his “education week homies” were asked to leave after nightly parties became an issue. “I was just trying to relive my glory days at BYU,” Allred said. “Take some classes, drink some chocolate milk, and party like it’s 1969.” BYU administration said that they “obviously” had to ask Allred to leave. Citing not only noise issues and dangers … Continue reading Elderly BYU Education Week Attendees Kicked Out After Throwing Massive Parties on Campus