World Famous Mountaineer Attempts to Scale RB Stairs, Dies of Exhaustion

Only the good die young. A sullen mood has swept over campus this morning. Colin Haley, world-famous mountaineer, was found lying dead a third of the way up the RB stairs around 7:30 am. A helicopter has since flown over to remove his body from the scene. What was going to be the most ambitious ascent of his career turned out to be the most … Continue reading World Famous Mountaineer Attempts to Scale RB Stairs, Dies of Exhaustion

Netflix Announces New Documentary “Funeral Potatoes among the Mormons”

  Netflix just announced on Monday their plans for the upcoming documentary, Funeral Potatoes among the Mormons, set to come out Easter 2022.  Though heavily upbeat, this documentary highlights the darkest part about Utah Mormon culture–the jello salad.  Every Easter, someone still brings it.  Someone else, however, brings hope to the table.  Funeral potatoes are the highlight of everyone’s year.  They are absolutely glorious, the way … Continue reading Netflix Announces New Documentary “Funeral Potatoes among the Mormons”

BYU Struggles to Spin Recent Y Lighting

BYU’s “Rainbow Day” came to a grand conclusion last Thursday with a rainbow lit ‘Y’ in support of LGBTQ+ students…or did it? After facing heavy criticism online for their initial response, University Communications is now attempting to reframe the purpose behind the recent ‘Y’ lighting.  The Alternate Universe was fortunate enough to bully a BYU social media intern into leaking a few of the University’s … Continue reading BYU Struggles to Spin Recent Y Lighting

BYU Observes International Women’s Day by Introducing Cosma, the Female Cougar

In an effort to increase representation and inclusion, Brigham Young University invites students to meet Cosma, a female version of the beloved mascot with a strong- but meek- message of female empowerment.  “Her talents, homemaking, virtue, meekness, and power to bear symbolize BYU standards,” explained Ed Bennett, BYU’s Director of Marketing and known male. “No, like Cosmo, she won’t speak- that’d be absurd. But she … Continue reading BYU Observes International Women’s Day by Introducing Cosma, the Female Cougar

BYU Offers Each Student One Free Taco Bell Baja Blast Freeze to Compensate for Canceled Summer Study Abroad Programs

Early last week, BYU International Study released their decision to once again cancel all Summer study abroad programs due to the global COVID-19 pandemic. Unsurprisingly, this announcement has left many students grieved, as they pack away their sombreros and chopsticks for a later day. In response to the low spirits, the International Study Program pulled some strings and came up with their idea of a … Continue reading BYU Offers Each Student One Free Taco Bell Baja Blast Freeze to Compensate for Canceled Summer Study Abroad Programs