BYU Student Inquires About Relationship Status of Incoming Freshman “Wendy”

BYU senior Dave Frederickson is currently seeking more information about a red-haired freshman he briefly saw in the Cougareat yesterday. While the beginning of Fall semester is already a popular time for upperclassmen to get to know students who are new to the university, Wendy seems to have caught the eyes of dozens of recently-returned missionaries.

“She definitely appears to be pretty popular.” he said, “It seems like guys are lining up for her, but hey, it’s what you would expect when a cute girl makes her way onto the heart of campus.” When asked what he liked most about her, Frederickson replied, “I don’t even know where to start…the freckles, pigtails, it’s everything; she truly is the total combo.”

Although he expects fierce competition from other seniors for her affection, he felt good about his chances after making the connection that they are both originally from Ohio, and added that he thinks he “pretty much has this one in the bag.” At press time, Frederickson was seen distraught after discovering Wendy is currently waiting for a missionary serving in Mexico named Elder McDonald.