Dallin H. Oaks Morphs Into Bald Eagle In Honor of Constitution Month

In a stunning display of religious patriotism, President Dallin H. Oaks of the First Presidency has publicly transformed himself into a bald eagle.
The transformation occurred at the peak of the newly-christened “Constitution month,” an attempt by the Utah government to stave off growing “anti-American sentiments” among the young people.
“I don’t even know how it happened,” observer Stevia Taylor commented. “Out of nowhere, I just saw him jump off of the Conference Center and fly away. Apostles can do that?!”
Governor Spencer Cox expressed his gratitude to President Oaks in a statement yesterday:
“I have never been prouder to be an American. Nothing says ‘I love the USA’ more than a religious leader spontaneously morphing into the coolest bird of all time. God bless America, and God bless Eagle Dallin H. Oaks.”
Though the act seems to have taken the Church community by surprise and awe, the jury is still out as to whether it has inspired a deeper reverence for America. One Teeyancum Scott commented, “Eagles are cool and all, but it’s getting really annoying talking about how the US is ‘God’s country’ every Sunday. I just wish it would stop.”
Attempts have been made to obtain commentary by Elder Oaks, but he has said nothing. The other Apostles have made no commentary other than to assure that President Oaks will be back in human form in time for General Conference next week.