The Creamery Outlet in Provo has been getting a lot of traction lately as guests swarm in to grab a brand new flavor: 4000 Bees In A Cup. “The new flavor contains as many as 4000 and as little as 3998 bees of many breeds. One to two bees sometimes get lost in the shuffle. There’s just so many of the little guys in there. … Continue reading Creamery Outlet Newest Flavor: 4000 Bees In A Cup

The Biology Department is proud to introduce the latest lab-grown specimen, Abednegeaux. Through a long period of research and trial and error, the lab was able to create a man more than worthy to be an LDS influencer. With rock hard abs, a temple recommend, and a tiny microphone, Abednegeaux is a model of algorithmic perfection.   Head bioengineer, Adam Lively said, “It only made … Continue reading BYU Biology Produces Third “Paris Triplet”

Did you know all people, ever, can generally be put into one of five boxes? After some investigative journalism, we at the Alternate Universe have consolidated all members of Married Student wards into these five categories.    Number 1: The Choir Couple    Every ward has at least one, but it’s more common to have 3-4 of these couples. If you’re lucky, the only way … Continue reading The Five Types of Couples in the Married Student Ward

In honor of the big game, Notre Dame’s favorite bell-ringer is thrilled to be leaving his tower to visit Coug Nation. His first outing in years, the hunchback looks forward to seeing the unique features that Provo has to offer.   Notre Dame team manager Hugo Victor said,   “Normally we make Quasi sit with the suitcases under the bus, but he really insisted on … Continue reading Quasimodo Really Excited to Visit Provo For Big Game