Category: Campus

Campus, Featured

BYU Adds Lazy River to Incentivise Students to take Summer Term Classes

Every year once winter finals are finally completed, Provo becomes a ghost town. As the hot singles return to their home states to do summer sales, the lonely “6 on a good day” singles and newly weds are tasked with defending Provo like their life depends on it. “It gets pretty lonely out here,” Jeremy Bird, 5-time Provo Summer veteran, told the Alternate Universe. “All … Continue reading BYU Adds Lazy River to Incentivise Students to take Summer Term Classes

Bobby Zimmeruski
Campus, Featured, Life

LeVar Burton to host surprise devotional for Reading Day

LeVar Burton, the longtime host of Reading Rainbow, is set to give a surprise devotional for all students studying on Reading Day. BYU administrators asked Burton to summarize the study guides for every class in a fifteen-hour devotional. The devotional has already begun and will go until midnight in the Marriot Center. Burton opened the devotional with, “Every major matters just as much as the … Continue reading LeVar Burton to host surprise devotional for Reading Day

Cameron Frye
Campus, Featured, Life, Uncategorized

Oscar for Best Actor Goes to Guy Pretending to Be Interested at Wilk Booth with Free Cookies

The votes are in. The 94th Academy Awards has named “the guy feigning interest at the Wilk booth in order to get a free cookie” the best actor of 2021. An exclusive interview with this man at the Oscar’s after party revealed more about what motivated his performance. “I have 23 cents in my bank account. I have subsisted on nothing but free booth cookies … Continue reading Oscar for Best Actor Goes to Guy Pretending to Be Interested at Wilk Booth with Free Cookies

Lisa Simpson
Campus, News

BREAKING: Election Recount Names a Mint Brownie™ New BYUSA President

On March 3rd, BYU students had the chance to vote for next year’s student association president. After the votes were tallied, Ethan Baker was announced as the 2022-23 BYUSA president, with Brandyn Young as executive vice president. Ever since this announcement, however, a large number of disgruntled students have demanded a recount. The Alternate Universe was able to interview a student protesting outside of the … Continue reading BREAKING: Election Recount Names a Mint Brownie™ New BYUSA President

Carmen Sandeigo