Category: Life

Life

Local Man Translated After Hitting “Share” on 7th Consecutive Post of Gratitude

After listening to President Nelson’s address on gratitude, local BYU student Brian Summers was determined to follow through on his challenge to share social media posts of gratitude for 7 days straight. At exactly 11:00AM today, Summers published his final post and according to one eye-witness “was immediately filled with light, overshadowed by a cloud, sucked up through an interdimensional portal”. Sources on the scene … Continue reading Local Man Translated After Hitting “Share” on 7th Consecutive Post of Gratitude

Warren Dusenberry1 Comment
Life

Student Disappointed He Can’t See Grandma for Holidays, Mails Her Anthrax to Make Up for It

BYU student Kyle Denver was disappointed to hear that his grandparents were going to play it safe this holiday season. Grandma and Grandpa Denver notified the Kyle and his family that they wouldn’t be coming into town for Thanksgiving to avoid catching COVID-19. They said they’d be calling over Zoom and Facetime to check in with the family. This was unacceptable to Kyle who decided … Continue reading Student Disappointed He Can’t See Grandma for Holidays, Mails Her Anthrax to Make Up for It

Donald Cherry
Life

Bishop claims chili cook-off vote was rigged

The Cedar Hills 17th Ward is back at it with more controversy. For Halloween, they held a chili cook-off. In accordance with safety precautions, members lined up in the church parking lot with their pots and gave ward members bowls as they drove through. Those who participated were given the opportunity to vote as they left the parking lot or vote on the ward’s Facebook … Continue reading Bishop claims chili cook-off vote was rigged

Cameron Frye
Life

Ghosts of Thanksgiving Past, Present and Future Haunt BYU Student Who Put Up Christmas Decorations Too Early

Local BYU student and Christmas enthusiast Maddie Baker had just finished stringing lights around the apartment and putting on her onesie Santa pajamas when the door began to rattle. Allegedly the ghost of Sarah Smith, a former roommate who transferred to UVU, trudged in weighed down by hundreds of cheap ornaments and neatly wrapped presents. “Maddie, my old friend. I’ve come to warn you!” shouted … Continue reading Ghosts of Thanksgiving Past, Present and Future Haunt BYU Student Who Put Up Christmas Decorations Too Early

Warren Dusenberry
Life

Book of Mormon Hero Teancum added to Mortal Kombat 11 as DLC fighter, according to leak.

In a recent leak on a popular gaming site, several characters were revealed to be coming to the popular M-rated fighting game Mortal Kombat 11. Along with your standard returning characters, comic book characters, and 80s movie characters the series is known for, one particular name stood out- Teancum. Many on the internet were confused about this character- with some even suggesting that it was … Continue reading Book of Mormon Hero Teancum added to Mortal Kombat 11 as DLC fighter, according to leak.

James West