Category: News

Campus, News, President Worthen

President Worthen Gets Tongue Stuck on Frozen Pole

For many, the season’s first snowfall was a welcome surprise on the last day of classes. From the square, students can be seen building snowmen, making snow angels, and catching snowflakes on the tips of their tongues. While much of campus is a serene winter wonderland, not everyone is enjoying the chillier weather. The Alternate Universe is currently live at an intense scene outside the … Continue reading President Worthen Gets Tongue Stuck on Frozen Pole

Lisa Simpson
News, Sports

BYU Prays Too Hard for Enemies, Loses to FSU in National Soccer Championship

In Matthew 5:44 of the King James Bible, Jesus says “but I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you”. In the Lord’s locker rooms on BYU campus, this isn’t counsel that many teams take lightly. It is common practice for BYU players to pray for their opponents right before a match. However, the commandment Jesus once gave in his Sermon … Continue reading BYU Prays Too Hard for Enemies, Loses to FSU in National Soccer Championship

Lisa Simpson
Campus, News

Leaked: Santa’s Christmas List

Last night, a reporter for the Alternate Universe was engaging in a late-night wander of campus, pondering finals and considering an existential crisis when they saw something cross the sky. Was it a bird, a plane? Had Cosmo learned to fly? No, none of the above. After a thorough investigation, the object was confirmed to be none other than Santa’s sleigh. As the sleigh passed … Continue reading Leaked: Santa’s Christmas List

Carmen Sandeigo
News

New Church program keeps elderly sisters busy, allows them to earn “Old Women’s Medallion”

In recent years, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints has made strides in creating an environment that caters to people from all walks of life. In an effort to expand this movement and make sure people in all seasons of life feel a part of the Lord’s Church, the Brethren have announced that starting in 2022, the new “Old Women’s” program will begin. … Continue reading New Church program keeps elderly sisters busy, allows them to earn “Old Women’s Medallion”

Lisa Simpson
News

Temple Cafeterias to be Converted into Gyms

On Friday, the church announced that temple cafeterias will be closing in early 2022. Today, they announced that the space will be transformed into gyms. In a recent survey, 64% of temple recommend holders answered that they don’t attend the temple because they are busy working out. In light of this, church leaders hope the adjustment will increase temple attendance worldwide. The purpose of this … Continue reading Temple Cafeterias to be Converted into Gyms

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