Category: News

News

New CDC Data Reveals Only 6% Of Egyptians Actually Died From Moses’ 10 Plagues

After reviewing some data in their spare time, officials at the Center for Disease Control have revealed some interesting results. According to the data and announcement, it seems as though most Egyptians had other preexisting conditions when afflicted by Moses’ 10 plagues. Most Egyptian citizens suffered from things like dysentery, tuberculosis and cholera in addition to locusts, boils, and the Angel of Death. CDC officials … Continue reading New CDC Data Reveals Only 6% Of Egyptians Actually Died From Moses’ 10 Plagues

Liz Lemon
News

Provo insists bad air quality is a government hoax

The air quality in Utah was thought to have gotten worse from recent fires, but Provo residents insist on the idea that the poor air quality is simply another hoax, much like COVID-19. “We all know that social distancing doesn’t do anything,” said Jared Wright, a BYU student studying environmental science. “The reason why the air was thought to be bad was because the government … Continue reading Provo insists bad air quality is a government hoax

Gail Black
Life, News

United States Postal Service’s Financial Woes Due to Online Mission Calls

Recently released internal reports show that ever since mission calls for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints switched to online delivery, the United States Postal Service has fallen into financial insolvency.  In 2019, they processed only 38% of the world’s mail, down from 40% when thousands of thick white envelopes from Salt Lake City were still flowing each year. “Let’s be honest, mission … Continue reading United States Postal Service’s Financial Woes Due to Online Mission Calls

Emil Ratburn III
News

Alternate Universe So Much More Successful, Wealthy, Liked Than Daily Universe That They Can Afford Billboard

The Daily Universe, a controversial BYU news publication recently flagged for exploiting free student labor, has allegedly been struggling to find relevance in the 21st century. Although the legacy organization has made leaps in distributing news content through digital channels, critics note that The Universe has slowly slipped behind its major competitor, The Alternate Universe. This fact became painfully obvious on Monday when The Alternate … Continue reading Alternate Universe So Much More Successful, Wealthy, Liked Than Daily Universe That They Can Afford Billboard

Warren Dusenberry
General Conference, Life, News

LDS Republicans Attend Pence’s “General Conference” in Arizona

Earlier this week, Vice President Mike Pence held a series of speeches in Arizona seeking to rally the support of the LDS community. These events were well attended by many Latter-Day Saints seeking words of counsel and comfort from their trusted religious leaders. “Hearing the words that Elder Pence…. I mean Vice President Pence spoke was such a witness to me that he really is … Continue reading LDS Republicans Attend Pence’s “General Conference” in Arizona

Donald Cherry1 Comment