It has recently come to the attention of The Alternate Universe that there is another “so-called” student-run news source at BYU. They call themselves The Daily Universe and are clearly a rip-off and scam of our very excellent and high quality newspaper.

“We are obviously the original and more-trustworthy newspaper. Just look at how many more followers we have than The Daily Universe” pointed out one of our beloved editors, Cameron Frye.

Another editor, Sue Sylvester, described how “those copycats obviously just stole our Instagram bio and picture format.”

It is obvious that our newspaper only delivers the rock-hard truth. As one totally unbiased passerby explained, “The Alternate Universe delivers the real truth and behind-the-scenes details. The Daily Universe only has lies.”

Another random totally unbiased passerby on BYU campus chimed in their opinion.

“It’s obvious that The Daily Universe is pro-censorship. They won’t even talk about Cosma the same-sex attracted cougar.”

A quote from another esteemed editor, Lisa Simpson, sums it all up.

“Don’t read The Daily Universe, you don’t want to support lies. Besides our newspaper is more interesting anyways.”