Mike Bloomberg targets college voters; pays BYU professors to advertise during lectures

The 2020 race for Democratic nomination anybody’s game, and Mike Bloomberg isn’t going to give up that easy. In recent weeks, Bloomberg has become notorious for his advertising, particularly online.  “It hasn’t really been enough, though,” said Joe Johnson, a BYU junior who runs the instagram account @BYU4Bloomburg, “Mike decided he needed to step it up and really aim for the college vote, so we’re … Continue reading Mike Bloomberg targets college voters; pays BYU professors to advertise during lectures

New Tik Tok Missions an Overwhelming Success, Missionary Work in China Speculated to Follow

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints’ recent decision to have missionaries join popular social media app Tik Tok has been an overwhelming success. Still in an experimental phase, the utilization of this online platform has only been established in a handful of missions across the globe. However, much like other technologically innovative additions to mission-work that have come before it (i.e. Facebook, tablets, … Continue reading New Tik Tok Missions an Overwhelming Success, Missionary Work in China Speculated to Follow

New Utah Poll Shows 70% of Residents Plan to Vote for Romney in 2020; Don’t Seem to Realize (or Care) That He Isn’t Running

In a surprising turn of events, it seems as though Mitt Romney—Utah senator and noted chocolate milk aficionado— is currently the favorite to win the 2020 election in Utah. A poll conducted by the BYU Creamery Foundation For Political Change showed that 70% of voters in the Honeybee state plan to vote for Romney, despite his clear stance against running in the coming election.  Apart … Continue reading New Utah Poll Shows 70% of Residents Plan to Vote for Romney in 2020; Don’t Seem to Realize (or Care) That He Isn’t Running

General Conference Protester Convinced This Year He’ll Bring Church Crumbling Down

Early Friday morning, Salt Lake area protester Noah Hamsterner began his preparations for the October 2020 General Conference of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. “It drives me crazy how these ‘sheeple’ keep coming and listening every year.” says Hamsterner, “This is the year that I’m going to bring the whole Church crumbling down. They’re not ready for the sign I’ve come up … Continue reading General Conference Protester Convinced This Year He’ll Bring Church Crumbling Down

CDC Declares Liberty Square in State of Emergency after Chemical Weapons Used in Parking Dispute

Even after Liberty Square management made parking spaces as small as possible – going so far as to hire physicists to ensure accuracy within the Planck Scale – it appears Provo’s widespread parking crisis has yet to be solved. After a series of escalating events, the Center for Disease Control had no choice but to declare a State of Emergency after anthrax was used in … Continue reading CDC Declares Liberty Square in State of Emergency after Chemical Weapons Used in Parking Dispute