Tag: Campus

Campus, Featured, News

Disappointing: ASB Demolition Yields No Treasure Despite Suspiciously Treasure-Shaped Design

After his third glass of apple juice one evening, President Reese had an ingenious realization: why would the ASB be shaped like an X if there was no buried treasure under it waiting to be unearthed? Well, several months and a demolition later, that question is left unanswered. “I had just let him stay up to watch Pirates of the Caribbean so I should have … Continue reading Disappointing: ASB Demolition Yields No Treasure Despite Suspiciously Treasure-Shaped Design

Don Cheadle
Campus, Featured, Life

How To Tell If Your Roommate Can Really Handle That Scary Movie

With the arrival of October, BYU students have begun the annual Reaping. Of movie partners, that is. “It’s a delicate process,” Miranda Mitchell, a dedicated horror nerd and Film Studies major, told me as she glanced furtively around the quad. “You have to send out signals without alerting the SOs of what you’re planning.” The SOs, or “Sheltered Ones,” are those BYU students who weren’t … Continue reading How To Tell If Your Roommate Can Really Handle That Scary Movie

Twitchy the Squirrel
Campus, Featured, Life

The Beginner’s Guide to Avoiding Your Ex on Campus

New school year, new you–and new mortifyingly awkward encounters with your former lovers. Because avoidance is more effective than therapy, take some time to organize your escape plan.   Stick to Buildings Where Your Ex Definitely Won’t Be. Hang around highbrow sanctuaries such as the MOA or the Kennedy Center, where only enlightened souls roam—not people who still owe you closure. Wear a Disguise While … Continue reading The Beginner’s Guide to Avoiding Your Ex on Campus

Kim Possible
Campus, Featured, News

BYU Benson Building to be Renamed the “Benson Boone” Building 

A mystical, magical moment in BYU history, the Benson building will be renamed in the singer’s honor to celebrate his new album. Driving down I-15, there are several billboards advertising Benson Boone’s upcoming American Heart Tour. What drivers may not have noticed, however, is the fine print at the bottom of the billboard, which says, “BYU Benson Boone Building coming soon.”  Just yesterday, BYU announced … Continue reading BYU Benson Building to be Renamed the “Benson Boone” Building 

Swedish Chef
Campus, Featured, News

BREAKING: Helaman Halls Literacy Rates Reach Record High of 25%

In the spirit of Reading Day, a handful of Helaman Halls residents have finally overcome their bibliophobia and learned to read and write. “I do not like green eggs and ham. I do not like them, Sam-I-am,” said Reed A. Booke, the 25th percent, unprompted. The fact remains that the majority of Helaman residents will not be participating in the campus-wide holiday. “That’s what the … Continue reading BREAKING: Helaman Halls Literacy Rates Reach Record High of 25%

Don Cheadle1 Comment