As finals approach, TAs all over campus are being flooded with requests from their students begging for extra credit and help. It’s gone to American Heritage TA Mahonri Dahl’s head.

“I am all powerful,” cackled Dahl as he put a crown of Scantrons onto his head. “These freshmen shall bow before me and know the might of a teaching assistant!”

“Is this another rule of law prank?” asked Nate Dynes, one of Dahl’s traumatized freshmen. “Or do I actually need to kiss his feet to pass the final?”

“This happens about once a semester. I’m not worried.” Professor Jeremy Pope commented. “I let the TAs sit on my throne of broken hearts and dreams, and then they get delusions of grandeur.”

At press time, Dahl was gleefully failing essays with a red pen while surrounded by hooded chanting students.