Report: New App ‘Angry AM’ Helps Activists Stay Outraged

With the emergence of the 24-hour news cycle and the ever-growing influence of social media, the average American is exposed to over 500 new news stories in a day. This has led to many people feeling confused and estranged regarding how they should maintain a steady level of outrage over socially relevant news stories. One group called “Angry AM” has attempted to solve this problem … Continue reading Report: New App ‘Angry AM’ Helps Activists Stay Outraged

Mueller Report Finds Evidence of Collusion Between President Nelson and God

Following 2 years of intense investigation into Russel M Nelson’s administration, special counsel Robert Mueller has finally released his findings on the prophet’s purported collusion with God. The report outlines evidence dating back to the President’s childhood of a suspiciously close relationship with his Maker, and concludes that Heavenly Father very much propelled the heart surgeon into his current position as leader of the Church … Continue reading Mueller Report Finds Evidence of Collusion Between President Nelson and God

EXCLUSIVE: BYU Police to be replaced with Flying Monkeys from The Land of Oz.

Following legal action resulting in elimination of the BYU police, officers will allegedly be replaced with the Flying Monkeys, on loan from the land of Oz. Beginning on May 1st, the Monkeys will begin residency on campus. They will assume full responsibilities formerly carried out by BYU police with one exception: the monkeys will be able to carry misbehaving students away to a dark tower … Continue reading EXCLUSIVE: BYU Police to be replaced with Flying Monkeys from The Land of Oz.

Upon Success of Provo Bachelor, BYU Students Begin Production on Provo Survivor, Provo Duck Dynasty, and Provo Hoarders

After the mega-hit Provo’s Most Eligible, also known as The Bachelor of Provo, producers have green-lit several Provo themed series including but not limited to “Provo Survivor,” “Provo Duck Dynasty,” and “Provo Hoarders.” . “Yeah, we have no problem stealing intellectual property or propagating harmful ideals such as those presented in the real version of The Bachelor, as long as we’re celebrating the unique culture … Continue reading Upon Success of Provo Bachelor, BYU Students Begin Production on Provo Survivor, Provo Duck Dynasty, and Provo Hoarders

Report: BYU Demi-God Jimmer Fredette Returns from China

Former BYU basketball deity Jimmer Fredette has officially signed a contract with the Phoenix Suns of the NBA. His Eminence had been playing with the Shanghai Sharks of the Chinese Basketball Association where He worked miracles as league international MVP and led the league in scoring for the 2016-2017 season. The deal is for two years with a team option for the second year when … Continue reading Report: BYU Demi-God Jimmer Fredette Returns from China