Category: News

Campus, Life, News, Uncategorized

BYU Students to Participate in ‘The Purge’ Following the Decertification of BYU Police

After legal action resulted in BYU Police losing the ability to make arrests and investigate crimes starting September 1st 2019, BYU students plan on holding an event they’re calling “The Purge” on September 2nd. “We’re just basically going to do what we want. The men will grow beards, the women will wear leggings, and we’ll stay out till 12:30 AM instead of midnight.” said Student … Continue reading BYU Students to Participate in ‘The Purge’ Following the Decertification of BYU Police

Liz Lemon
Campus, Life, News

BYU Theater Department to Perform Censored Version of “The Book of Mormon” Musical

The BYU Department of Theater and Media Arts announced that it will be producing an adapted version of South Park creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone’s hit musical “The Book of Mormon.” “We’re really looking forward to showing BYU students the musical,” said student director and theatre major Sarah Andrews. “My parents saw it on Broadway and walked out after the first 15 minutes, but … Continue reading BYU Theater Department to Perform Censored Version of “The Book of Mormon” Musical

Liz Lemon1 Comment
Campus, News

BREAKING: BYU Creamery Recalls Batch of Unblessed Ice Cream

Feb 28, 2019- To the surprise of many, the Creamery on 9th has officially announced a recall of over 50 gallons of unblessed Graham Canyon ice cream.  “We diligently pray over all of our products before they are made available to the public. In the event that this doesn’t happen, we feel it is our responsibility to make sure people are given ample warning.” comments … Continue reading BREAKING: BYU Creamery Recalls Batch of Unblessed Ice Cream

Donald Cherry
Campus, News

Learning Suite Creators Post Permanent “We’re Sorry” Message on Login Page

After years of unsuccessfully wrestling with the code of BYU’s most feared and hated website, the creators of Learning Suite have posted a straightforward, permanent apology on the login page. The message (a low-res “we’re sorry” followed by a pre-emoji-era frowny face) was designed to constantly beg the forgiveness of the thousands of BYU students who have ever used their course management software. Although it … Continue reading Learning Suite Creators Post Permanent “We’re Sorry” Message on Login Page

Warren Dusenberry
Life, News

Local Student Confident He Will Recognize Correct Answer if Ballot is Multiple Choice

Tired of cramming for today’s midterm elections, local BYU student Michael Kap is calling it quits, confident that if the ballot is multiple choice he’ll recognize the correct answer right away when he sees it in the voting booth. “If there’s just going to be a series of bubbles and all the potential answers are listed next to them, I’m honestly not too worried about … Continue reading Local Student Confident He Will Recognize Correct Answer if Ballot is Multiple Choice

Warren Dusenberry