Imagine a world where devotionals are unoriginal, lacking in the Spirit. Where prayers are no longer inspired, they are generated. Where Sunday School lessons and sacrament meeting talks no longer have to be written by a human. We are now living in this world, thanks to the newest AI development: ChatCTR. While sacrament meeting talks used to be an agonizing slog of preparation, with ChatCTR, … Continue reading LDS Church Releases New AI Tool ‘ChatCTR’
The G-Rated, LDS version of the highly anticipated “Cocaine Bear” introduces a cautionary tale about choosing the right. All in moderation. Amongst few, unemployed LDS historians, a hot debate takes place on the origins of The First Vision. Those like David Deserat believe the dark power that overwhelmed Joseph Smith seconds before the first vision was none other than a wild cougar, dressed in the … Continue reading “Cocaine Cougar” Sells Out Varsity Theater Second Night in a Row
In Doctrine and Covenants section 87, Joseph Smith accurately predicted the coming Civil War, 30 years before it began. This was not enough to convince his doubters of his prophetic calling. Well, let’s see them try to explain this. While demolishing the HFAC, construction worker Tim Devon discovered a box underneath a granite slab. In the box was discovered a 50 page prophecy, accurately and … Continue reading Newly Discovered Joseph Smith Prophecy Accurately Predicts Entire MCU
It’s no secret that America is facing a heartbreaking egg shortage right now. Stores are buckling under the pressure of trying to sell eggs they don’t have. Roommates grapple with contention as eggs are stolen from their prized cartons. Vegetarians waste away, unable to consume their singular source of protein. Anguished by these events, a faithful son of God by the name of The Brother … Continue reading Amidst Inflation Crisis, Finger of the Lord Turns Stones to Eggs
After two whole semesters of no child support from their deadbeat dad, single FHE mom Tiffaneigh Leigh of Provo YSA 12345th ward took legal action and was granted full custody of her 15 adult children. While Tiffaneigh herself would report that the court ruling was sweet, anyone who was involved in this case can attest that the litigation was sour. “Having to get up on … Continue reading Single FHE Mom Wins Heated Custody Battle
