Hang up your ties and put down your scriptures because, ladies and gentlemen, you will never be as good as him. Best just put your dreams of celestial glory on the shelf :/

We know the gospel is all about second chances but YEESH. You’d have a lot to catch up on to beat this guy, and that’s just way too much work. Best keep your self-esteem at an all time low and wait for the bar to get to your level.

“My pronouns on LDS Tools are ‘he,’ not ‘him,’ because I’ll never be him,” shared Llogaghn Storms, who is currently in his self-deprecation era.

As we all know, it takes a village to raise a self-righteous child, and Mikey Rodds was no exception.

“As my old Sunday School teacher once said, ‘pronunciation has a lot to do with consecration,'” he shared.

In fact, pronunciation wasn’t the only commitment that Rodds made to make the people around him feel like crap. During his interview, he shared the following insight with glowing pride:

“In addition to saying ‘ahmen,’ I’ve also decided to save my first kiss for marriage.”

Journalists confirm that he is actually just afraid of sex. Maybe you’ll be righteous enough one day to be afraid of sex too!