Barricading began at 5 a.m. in preparation for the 1 p.m. lunch rush.

By 10 a.m., students began facing biological setbacks.

“I had to ask my buddy to bring me diapers so my pee wouldn’t make me lose my spot in line,” said Joe Becker, who is allegedly potty trained.

When the dedicated students finally started taking turns with the microwave, their suffering reached a new level.

Brandon Lee, coated in electromagnetic marine stench, submitted the following complaint:

“Of course the first person in line was microwaving a Lean Cuisine tortilla-crusted fish entrée,” he said.

Though the journey was long and the destination was suffocating, students expressed gratitude for the character-building experience.

“It was so touching to see so many people gather and suffer together, all for the love of microwave,” stated Jeremy Burbano, a raging microwave fan of 10 years.