REPORT: People Care More About MoTab Mustache Guy Than Our Actual Prophet

According to recent polls among BYU students, people feel more inspired by this Ron Swanson knockoff than by the First Presidency and Quorum of the Twelve Apostles. While conference has generated a significant amount of buzz related to our new prophet and first presidency, this guy continues to overpower all old-man-related gossip.  Whispers generated from the grapevine reveal that this guy is immortal and will … Continue reading REPORT: People Care More About MoTab Mustache Guy Than Our Actual Prophet

Elder Rasband Seen Writing Entire Conference Talk Last Minute

Having seemingly procrastinated until the day before General Conference weekend, a panicked Elder Ronald A. Rasband has been spotted trying to crank out his entire talk in one night. “general conferenfce talk ~20 mintues make it sounds like not ai pls thansk,” Rasband was seen typing into ChatGPT around 6:00 on Friday night. Every General Conference speaker is expected to submit a copy of their … Continue reading Elder Rasband Seen Writing Entire Conference Talk Last Minute

Updates to the BYU Honor Code Prevent Students from Using Hats to Cover Up Male-pattern Baldness

University leaders re-emphasize the importance of honesty in all things with the new dress and grooming standard.   Many students were shocked when the Brigham Young University Honor Code Office issued a statement that they would no longer allow hats on BYU campus. While hats have allowed men with male-pattern baldness to hide their receding hairlines since the university’s founding, the Honor Code Office has … Continue reading Updates to the BYU Honor Code Prevent Students from Using Hats to Cover Up Male-pattern Baldness