Life

Thanksgiving Guide: How To Get Through A Conversation About Your Non-Existent Relationship

Well, it’s that time of year again. You’re headed home for Thanksgiving break. There’ll be turkey, cranberry sauce, mashed potatoes, and the inevitable conversation about your lack of a relationship. All of us here at The Alternate Universe know how embarrassing it can be to admit to your parents, siblings, and nosy great-aunt that another year has gone by and you’re still not in a … Continue reading Thanksgiving Guide: How To Get Through A Conversation About Your Non-Existent Relationship

Liz Lemon
Life

Local Student Mistakenly Thinks Today’s ‘Friday Schedule’ Extends Beyond Classes

Earlier today, a student was put on probation after a series of events that happened as a result of BYU declaring that today was for Friday instruction, despite it being a Tuesday. Mitchell Hughes, a senior who lives at The Village, had four debacles as a result of this common confusion. First, Hughes showed up 20 minutes late to his PS 100 class and missed … Continue reading Local Student Mistakenly Thinks Today’s ‘Friday Schedule’ Extends Beyond Classes

Chase Everhart
Life

President Nelson Installs Giving Machines in Every Home, Makes it Easier to ‘Light The World’

In another instance of bold leadership by the president of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Russell M. Nelson announced Sunday night that red giving machines would be delivered to and installed in the homes of every Latter-day Saint.  I am so proud of the work that men and women, inside and outside the Church, have done in regard to caring for the … Continue reading President Nelson Installs Giving Machines in Every Home, Makes it Easier to ‘Light The World’

Titus Wilkerson
Campus

BYU Shaves Maeser Statue, Removes All Campus References to Bearded Men

In an effort to improve the schools’ honor and to condemn sinful behaviors, BYU has recently begun a series of radical adjustments to campus buildings and statues to remove references to beards, citing them as evils from a less enlightened time. Among these changes the Heber J. Grant building has been renamed to The Dungeon, the JFSB has been renamed to the Gillette Mach 5 … Continue reading BYU Shaves Maeser Statue, Removes All Campus References to Bearded Men

Warren Dusenberry