Category: Life

Campus, Life, News

Incensed Patron Upends Table of Chatty Students in HBLL Reading Room

The BYU Library, otherwise known as the HBLL (Harold B. Lee Library), has precious few quiet zones, limited to the 5th floor during times of no construction, the 2nd floor Reading Room or Periodicals, and the 1st floor Social Sciences Section. Students requiring enforced quiet study for concentration are limited to these three areas. Unfortunately, since these three areas have some of the greatest square … Continue reading Incensed Patron Upends Table of Chatty Students in HBLL Reading Room

Kayteigh Leigh
Featured, Life, News, Provo

BYU Students Accused Of Cultural Appropriation By Oompa Loompa Community For Spray Tans

In the wake of the recent slew of marriage announcements and monthly recaps being posted to instagram, the Oompa Loompa community has voiced concern over BYU students’ overbearing use of artificial tanning.  Oompa Loompa political figure and influencer Hugh Grant recently took to social media with the following statement:  “My culture is not your costume.” The comment shocked BYU students and faculty and has left … Continue reading BYU Students Accused Of Cultural Appropriation By Oompa Loompa Community For Spray Tans

Frank Heffley
Campus, Featured, Life, News, Provo

In Stunning Display of Creativity, Every Band Featured in Battle of the Bands Sort of Sounds Like Imagine Dragons

Provo, Utah, noted for being birthplace to the famous bands Imagine Dragons and Neon Trees, leaves many up-and-coming bands dreaming of what may be following BYUSA’s Battle of the Bands. That legacy has greatly shaped the Provo music scene as we at the Alternate Universe look ahead to tonight’s Battle of the Bands. In a three-hour performance, concertgoers will be able to hear a wide … Continue reading In Stunning Display of Creativity, Every Band Featured in Battle of the Bands Sort of Sounds Like Imagine Dragons

Chuck Bartowski
Campus, Life, News

BREAKING: BYU to Build New Creamery Where Old Creamery Was

Sources report that BYU has decided to maximize the new space on campus by building a new Creamery on the site of the old Creamery. While many different ideas were rumored, it is now confirmed that the lot of land that used to house the old Creamery on Ninth will now be built into a new Creamery on Ninth. According to sources, the idea was … Continue reading BREAKING: BYU to Build New Creamery Where Old Creamery Was

Chuck Bartowski
Campus, Featured, Life

Looksmaxxer Clavicular Brutally Frame-Mogged by Barefoot Cosmo

Sorry, Clavvy. You mess with the cat, you’ve gotta go toe-to-toe with the dawgs. “I can’t believe a misogymaxxed moidslop chudcel like him would even jestergoon around a cougarpilled canthal tilt like Cosmo’s. Enjoy that career-ending cortisol spike, bud,” said onlooker John Volcel. Clavicular was unable to comment as he was busy crying in the corner of the Milk & Cookies lounge. Barefoot Cosmo, stoic … Continue reading Looksmaxxer Clavicular Brutally Frame-Mogged by Barefoot Cosmo

Don Cheadle