BYU Adds Lazy River to Incentivise Students to take Summer Term Classes
Every year once winter finals are finally completed, Provo becomes a ghost town. As the hot singles return to their home states to do summer sales, the lonely “6 on a good day” singles and newly weds are tasked with defending Provo like their life depends on it. “It gets pretty lonely out here,” Jeremy Bird, 5-time Provo Summer veteran, told the Alternate Universe. “All … Continue reading BYU Adds Lazy River to Incentivise Students to take Summer Term Classes
Thousands Kept From Graduation Due to New Devotional Attendance Requirement
Church Audits Students Who Don’t Pay Tithing
Through our very intense journalism efforts, The Alternate Universe discovered a surprising secret last week: the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints audits BYU students who do not pay their tithing. After uncovering this secret The Alternate Universe conducted a thorough series of interviews to get to the bottom of it. Lehi Turner, head Church accountant, told us, “We just want to make sure … Continue reading Church Audits Students Who Don’t Pay Tithing
LeVar Burton to host surprise devotional for Reading Day
LeVar Burton, the longtime host of Reading Rainbow, is set to give a surprise devotional for all students studying on Reading Day. BYU administrators asked Burton to summarize the study guides for every class in a fifteen-hour devotional. The devotional has already begun and will go until midnight in the Marriot Center. Burton opened the devotional with, “Every major matters just as much as the … Continue reading LeVar Burton to host surprise devotional for Reading Day
Gospel Library Adds New Narration Voices
Bored of the monotonous Utah accent? Now’s your chance to get a fun, fresh experience while listening to the scriptures. This initiative was started to “persuade youth to pay more attention to the scriptures.” Here are the new voices: Batman a sexy voice that will make you more into scripture study ASMR perfect for falling asleep to Batman attempting ASMR even better for falling asleep … Continue reading Gospel Library Adds New Narration Voices
