Quiz: What’s Your Utah Name?
Scientists Prove that Apartment Proximity to Campus is Inversely Proportional to How Big of a Tool You Are
After an in depth study, scientists (if psychologists can be called scientists) claim to have proven that the distance someone lives from campus is inversely proportional to how big of a tool they are. In other words, if someone lives close to campus, they’re a pretty big tool. The BYU Psychology Department classified five zones for student housing: south of campus for normal people, west … Continue reading Scientists Prove that Apartment Proximity to Campus is Inversely Proportional to How Big of a Tool You Are
New Utah Poll Shows 70% of Residents Plan to Vote for Romney in 2020; Don’t Seem to Realize (or Care) That He Isn’t Running
In a surprising turn of events, it seems as though Mitt Romney—Utah senator and noted chocolate milk aficionado— is currently the favorite to win the 2020 election in Utah. A poll conducted by the BYU Creamery Foundation For Political Change showed that 70% of voters in the Honeybee state plan to vote for Romney, despite his clear stance against running in the coming election. Apart … Continue reading New Utah Poll Shows 70% of Residents Plan to Vote for Romney in 2020; Don’t Seem to Realize (or Care) That He Isn’t Running
Salt Lake City Woman Hates LDS Faith, Consults Horoscope Daily for Inspired Spiritual Advice
Sherri Mcgeel is the epitome of a millennial woman living in Utah. She lives in Salt Lake City, drives a Prius, starts her morning at Starbucks, works a traditional 9-5 at her local essential oils dealer, shops at Trader Joes, and spends her free time complaining about the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints on social media. “I just can’t believe that the Mormon … Continue reading Salt Lake City Woman Hates LDS Faith, Consults Horoscope Daily for Inspired Spiritual Advice
Orem Mall Officials Brace for Second Week of Dozens of FHE Groups Playing ‘Where’s Waldo’
At University Place mall in Orem, shoppers and workers alike are bracing themselves for what is shaping up to be another chaotic Monday night. Mall employees are still reeling from last week when an unknown number of FHE groups converged on the shopping center to play Where’s Waldo. The game, based on the popular book series, involves one person dressed in red and white stripes … Continue reading Orem Mall Officials Brace for Second Week of Dozens of FHE Groups Playing ‘Where’s Waldo’
