A strain of what specialists are calling “Brigham Butt” is surging campus-wide, sparking concern over public restrooms and the severe toilet splash back when flushing. Infected students report symptoms of itchiness, burning sensations, unpleasant odor, and feelings of immense dread as the epidemic spreads.   Mathematics major Derek Bottom described his experience:   “I got Brigham Butt from the center stall in the Wilk. That … Continue reading BYU Faces Outbreak of “Brigham Butt” From Campus Toilet Splash Back

As the world spectates the winter olympics together, BYU has the honor and privilege of providing delicious nutrition to this year’s athletes. To honor the beautiful country of Italy where the competition is taking place, leaders chose the Cannon Center’s Euro Kitchen to serve the world’s greatest competitors. Cannon Center chef Shawn Smith said: “The world is our campus, but it is also our kitchen. … Continue reading 2026 Winter Olympics to be Catered by Cannon Center Italian Corner

Being the leading lady for The Bachelorette’s 22nd season isn’t easy. With all the responsibility of making headlines and making Mormon people uncomfortable, needing to consolidate and prioritize is totally valid. Here are some other things that Ms. Paul will be leaving at home this season:    Her 3 kids  Indy, Ocean, and Ever will appear in the finale when they have to meet their … Continue reading Other Things Taylor Frankie Paul is Leaving at Home for The Bachelorette

At the heart of global engagement at Brigham Young University is the acclaimed David M. Kennedy Center for International Studies. As more and more students are participating in study abroad programs every year, the institution has announced a brand new program that will take students to Turkey to study hair and scalp health–as well as receive hair transplants for many a balding cougar.   BYU … Continue reading Kennedy Center Announces “Turkish Trichology” Study Abroad for Students Seeking Hair Plugs

If you’ve been following the Alternate Universe lately, you’ve seen the alarming news that Cosmo, as well as eleven other mascots were abducted. While this was devastating for the community, it wasn’t long before BYU made its comeback. In a shocking turn of events, Gay Mountain, who came out last year, rose to the occasion. Through intense seismic activity, Gay Mountain defeated the mascot’s abductor, … Continue reading Gay Mountain Saves Cosmo From Vecna