EXCLUSIVE: BYU Police to be replaced with Flying Monkeys from The Land of Oz.
Following legal action resulting in elimination of the BYU police, officers will allegedly be replaced with the Flying Monkeys, on loan from the land of Oz. Beginning on May 1st, the Monkeys will begin residency on campus. They will assume full responsibilities formerly carried out by BYU police with one exception: the monkeys will be able to carry misbehaving students away to a dark tower … Continue reading EXCLUSIVE: BYU Police to be replaced with Flying Monkeys from The Land of Oz.
Upon Success of Provo Bachelor, BYU Students Begin Production on Provo Survivor, Provo Duck Dynasty, and Provo Hoarders
After the mega-hit Provo’s Most Eligible, also known as The Bachelor of Provo, producers have green-lit several Provo themed series including but not limited to “Provo Survivor,” “Provo Duck Dynasty,” and “Provo Hoarders.” . “Yeah, we have no problem stealing intellectual property or propagating harmful ideals such as those presented in the real version of The Bachelor, as long as we’re celebrating the unique culture … Continue reading Upon Success of Provo Bachelor, BYU Students Begin Production on Provo Survivor, Provo Duck Dynasty, and Provo Hoarders
Report: BYU Demi-God Jimmer Fredette Returns from China
Former BYU basketball deity Jimmer Fredette has officially signed a contract with the Phoenix Suns of the NBA. His Eminence had been playing with the Shanghai Sharks of the Chinese Basketball Association where He worked miracles as league international MVP and led the league in scoring for the 2016-2017 season. The deal is for two years with a team option for the second year when … Continue reading Report: BYU Demi-God Jimmer Fredette Returns from China
Embarrassed BYU Honor Code Office Apologizes to Students for Taking Their Promises Seriously
Following a surge of public criticism, the BYU Honor Code Office released a statement today apologizing for earnestly believing that students were serious about keeping the promises they make every year in order to attend the private university. “I think this has all been a great misunderstanding.” writes Jeff Summers, director of dress code violations, in a statement released to the press, “This whole time … Continue reading Embarrassed BYU Honor Code Office Apologizes to Students for Taking Their Promises Seriously
10 Great Things to Do on BYU’s Spring Day
It’s finally here! The best day of the BYU school year! A welcome break for hardworking students and faculty. Some find it a little overwhelming planning how to fill an entire 24 hours of extra time, so here are some suggestions from your friends at The Alternate Universe. 1) Do Homework Why not use this extra time to get ahead or maybe catch up on … Continue reading 10 Great Things to Do on BYU’s Spring Day