BREAKING: To Prevent Priestcraft, CES Mandates Boring Religion Classes
Priestcraft, or the practice of preaching for the sake of a following rather than for the religious message, has become an issue for professors at religious universities. In a recent policy change issued by The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints’ Church Education System (CES), all future religion classes taught across church universities must be “really, really boring” to prevent concerns. “We love all … Continue reading BREAKING: To Prevent Priestcraft, CES Mandates Boring Religion Classes
LDS HQ Announces Proposal to Increase the Church’s Bottom Line
After a free consulting evaluation, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has created a bold new plan to help increase profits and boost morale. 1. Gospel Library ProPlusPremium Members will find a variety of subscription options on the Gospel Library App. 2. General Conference Sponsors/ Product Placement Revenue will be collected and used to provide church buildings with less scratchy walls. 3. MSF … Continue reading LDS HQ Announces Proposal to Increase the Church’s Bottom Line
Sales Bro Suspected of AI Usage by Mutual Date After Considerate Follow-Up Text
With the rise of generative text AI models such as ChatGPT and Grok, it has become more and more difficult to discern whether writing has been composed by a human or a machine. In a recent scandal, Provo Sales Bro Brandon Baker has been suspected of blatant AI usage after sending unusually thoughtful and composed messages to Maddy Nielsen, his recent Mutual date. “We had … Continue reading Sales Bro Suspected of AI Usage by Mutual Date After Considerate Follow-Up Text
Creamery Announces New MiLK Chocolate & Vanilla Dream Flavor, Ends Racism
While racism on BYU campus itself has never been an issue, the Creamery has taken it upon itself to eradicate the very concept entirely, finally fulfilling the 63-year-old dream of Martin Luther King Jr. “The seamless blend of colors on a gradient from black to white is a lactic representation of the flawless integration we have here on our campus. This ice cream is our … Continue reading Creamery Announces New MiLK Chocolate & Vanilla Dream Flavor, Ends Racism
BYU Bookstore Releases New Candle Line Inspired by Scents from Around Campus
Ever get homesick for BYU during long weekends and breaks? Now you don’t have to go a day without your favorite familiar smells. The BYU Bookstore recently released a new line of candles that’s already flying off the shelves. Here are a few of the scents available: Hallway Microwave Notes: Yesterday’s Spaghetti, Indian Food, Dread Wilk Jamba Juice Notes: Frozen fruit, Bright colors, … Continue reading BYU Bookstore Releases New Candle Line Inspired by Scents from Around Campus
