Inspiring: ADHD Club Catches Up On A Semester’s Worth Of Meetings In One Day
We love to see it! After postponing its weekly meetings 12 times in a row, BYU’s ADHD club finally locked in and cranked out every single one of them in the space of just one day. The string of meetings consisted of various unrelated thoughts, copious amounts of yapping, and minimal actions taken. The first meeting was scheduled for 9 a.m. and began at 1:37 … Continue reading Inspiring: ADHD Club Catches Up On A Semester’s Worth Of Meetings In One Day
“Minister? I Hardly Know Her”—Joke Falls Flat at 4th Disappointing Ministering Interview in a Row
As laid out in the handbook, the leadership of the Provo YSA 678th Ward attempts to carry out ministering interviews once a quarter. Shaleigh Howe, a junior at BYU, went into her interview knowing she had not done a single thing with any of the sisters to whom she is assigned to minister. Howe thought she could get away with a quick interview by using … Continue reading “Minister? I Hardly Know Her”—Joke Falls Flat at 4th Disappointing Ministering Interview in a Row
Dallin Hall Declared Lisan al-Gaib
History was made in Omaha on Thursday as a BYU basketball player declared that he would lead the university to paradise and a National Championship before their first March Madness game. “No one in this room can stand against me,” declared point guard Dallin Hall as he took center court before Thursday’s game. “Your mothers warned you about my coming. Fear the moment.” Mark Pope, … Continue reading Dallin Hall Declared Lisan al-Gaib
Cosmo Cougar Gets Brazilian Butt Lift
BYU’s beloved mascot, Cosmo, has gotten a little cheekier. The acrobatic cat recently underwent a procedure to add some extra size to his hindquarters and has become, for lack of a better term, “dummy thicc.” While rumors about the change spread at first, Cosmo’s most recent public appearance put those myths to rest. When asked about the new changes, students have reacted differently. Freshman Jaykob … Continue reading Cosmo Cougar Gets Brazilian Butt Lift
General Stabbed on the Ides of March as Helaman-Heritage War Drags On
As Heritage and Helaman Halls continue to take up arms against each other for some reason that nobody actually remembers, Army of Helaman General Audrey Thibaughlt has displayed extreme prowess as a strategist. But no hero is without flaw. Her ambition had become apparent to her officers, and they seized the opportunity to put an end to it. Thibaughlt was stabbed ten times–once for each … Continue reading General Stabbed on the Ides of March as Helaman-Heritage War Drags On